Learning to Relax

Not a hard place to relax.  As a family we try to do a vacation each year together to connect, laugh, and have fun together.  Sometimes really cool places like the DR, other years it has been more local, like Mesa Verde.  I have found the place isn’t as important as the committed time together.  The time to step away from everyday demands.  I wish I could say that was easy for me, but it isn’t.

Over the past couple of years I am changing my work/rest patterns.  For many years it was work 350 days a year and take a couple weeks off.  I still do the few weeks off, but the pattern that has changed for me is work 5-6 days and take 1-2 off.  I took a leadership class a few years ago and there was a large part of taking a 24-hour sabbath each week.  I knew the 10 commandments but honestly, I would have told you that one didn’t apply today.  However, the more I read and the more successful people I talked to, the more I noticed that this was a valuable practice.

Taking 24 hours off of all work was a really foreign idea to me.  I grew up in the Midwest and my parents were always busy working and doing things.  A lot of my career I have had 2 jobs or was starting a side company or project.  Busy is just how I tend to operate.  For me, if I wasn’t busy or working, there was a guilt factor that always came with relaxing.  My old thought was “What would one do with 24 hours of no work?”  Around this same time though a theme kept coming up in my life – Chose Joy.  I had this vision of a little girl jumping off a dock without a care in the world.  I wanted to be that little girl.  I knew I couldn’t have them both – work all the time and be that carefree girl.  My leadership teacher told me to start with 2-4 hours instead of 24 and work to increase this each week.  I am not legalist about my time, but I really do try to plan it.  I think about down time as doing things I enjoy, seeing friends, spending time with our family…. the kicker for me, doing it guilty free.  My guess is that some of you will read this and think – who in the world has a hard time taking time off.  Others are going to get this and understand that same feeling of guilt.  For me, understanding that the guilt keeps me from choosing joy helps me put it off to the side and know that it is unfounded.

As we were wrapping up the week of vacation, I told Jeff one of the things I have loved most about this trip is not being tired.  We only did 1 excursion and spent the rest of the time at the pool or just hanging out.  Early to bed and no alarm in the morning.  I think it hit me that I operate a lot of life being exhausted – I know you all understand that one!  Even with the 24-hour sabbath each week, the demands are high.  I am ok with that, but it is something I am going to watch over the next few months to see if I can do a better job of keeping it in check because I don’t think we operate as our best selves when we are running on empty or close to it.

If this is an area where you might need to adjust your thinking or behaviors of how much you work or go compared to how much you are really choosing things that bring you joy, I challenge you over the next 2 weeks to start with little increments of guilt free time.  Be the little girl jumping off the dock choosing joy!